runs like satan

a

runs like satan

a

hi im rachel and once someone told me i was kinda funny.

bulletbutt:

So this little kid at church noticed I’m fat and asked me today “Why do you have a big belly?”

I couldn’t really think of an acceptable answer for that so I simply responded:

“Because I’m full of bees”

I don’t think I’ve seen a more confused and terrified child in my life as I walked away, hearing him whisper “Bees…” to himself.

(Source: fireyams, via melon-collies)

slomps:

shoutout to those people who see you fuck up real bad and just laugh with you

(via dicapriobliss)

pleatedjeans:

via

pleatedjeans:

via

(via isis-)

landorus:

cashier: that’ll be $4.20

me: bruh

cashier: bruh

(via rowlingindadeep)

thatsmoderatelyraven:

I think we need to be more careful of old people. What are they doing awake so early in the morning before the rest of us

(via canujustlikenot)

superstreetfighter2turbohdremix:

i am 0% the person i was three years ago and i would probably get in a fight with 2011 me

(via smile--with-me)

inbalanced:

Me on my period: sings Bleeding Out by Imagine Dragons for entire week

(Source: inbalanced, via ineedtopoopnow)

moonkistprincess:

"i was born in the wrong generation" i say as i steal my grandkids hoverboards because fuck you i was promised these years ago

(via eeeeezio)

genderoftheday:

Today’s Gender of the day is: Radical Carrot

genderoftheday:

Today’s Gender of the day is: Radical Carrot

(via thesarcasticpegasus)

(Source: jaidefinichon, via isis-)

fvkie:

Regular sex was the best man